Suggested Response: 

Taking immediate action as a bystander can be uncomfortable, especially on a Zoom or telephone conference call. It is even more complicated if the violator is a superior. However, for the working group's health going forward, it is important to resolve the behavior when it occurs. If you are a bystander, try the following:



Step 1:  Get the violator's attention. Call him by name until he pauses and ask him to let you speak.



Step 2:  Speak with a stern but gentle voice. Aggressive language may put the violator on the defensive, and he will be thinking about how to respond rather than listening to you. Be calm, firm, and confident.



Step 3:  Alert the violator to his inappropriate statement and remind him that such comments violate company policy. For example, "Insecure Trip, you just made a racially insensitive comment when you told the group that Jackie was included in our group to satisfy company diversity requirements. Not funny. You know such comments violate company policy. Obviously, she has been included for her special expertise, and her contributions will be very valuable." If you can use a more light-hearted and gentle voice, he might appreciate your tone and courage and not insult from your admonition. 



Step 4: Hopefully, Insecure Trip will immediately apologize to Jackie. If he does not, address Jackie and apologize to her and the group on Insecure Trip's behalf. If he does not ask for her participation on the call or ignores her, make an effort to ask for Jackie's input, or encourage her contribution. The group and the violator may then realize that she will indeed be a valuable member.

Step 5:  If the violator refuses to stop despite your warning, call him separately to let him know your objection. If you are not comfortable doing so, find a more senior person to talk to him about his behavior. If that does not help and you have a Human Resources Department, file a complaint. If you do not have such a department, call the boss. Have a more senior person join you for support. 



🚨Intervention exhibits your leadership skills and can be especially impactful coming from a male colleague. Men will listen to men. 



Let's help #changetheculture to a more healthy and prosperous environment, free from #abuse. #TimesUp. Let’s #playnice at work and stop and #workplacesexualharassment. For more on this topic and for other exercise examples, please check out our new book “Play Nice - Playground Rules for Respect in the Workplace,”  and join us at the www.thesandboxseries.com.